Young Members of Parliament—or the P65s, as they’re called on “the streets” (well, in the papers, at least)—are forming a hip hop outfit to perform at next year’s Chingay Parade, in an attempt to appeal to youths. Yet, the most glaring misconception in this idea is that you can’t make someone cool. If you’re an MP first, and a hip hopper second, then that’s the natural order of things. What we would suggest the government do, if they want to appeal to young people, is to turn things around a little. Why make an MP hip … when you can make a hip person an MP?So confident are we that this idea is going to be a complete success that we’ve drawn up a job advertisement that the government could use (thank us later, folks). Fo’ shizzle, baby.The Republic of Singapore,a fast-growing multinational Southeast Asian country, is looking for Members of Parliament (also known by their street tags as MPs)Details of the jobA bridge between the community and the government; making the voice of your constituency heard in Parliament; and being totally bitchin’, dawg.RequirementsAn approachable “people” person who must be able to communicate with anyone, from fellow MPs to hawker stall owners to those scrubs that be all trippin’ in the clubs, trying to be playas, but only comin’ off as haters.Relevant candidates should possessGreat communication skills, a youthful and presentable outlook (especially necessary for our outreach programs), and the ability to dance at relevant events and still keep your cool.BenefitsAttractive salary and benefits, such as totally fly bling, will be offered to the successful candidate. A smashing remunerative package that includes half a year’s bonus will also be offered to those who perform above expectations (the ability to raise funds is a plus).Interested candidates please send your CV to PM Lee Hsien Loong, who will be conducting interviews at the Youth Park. This will be a good gauge to see if the candidate has what it takes be a real homie. Only shortlisted candidates will be notified. Word.
