4(D) On the Floor

Time was when two dimensions were enough. When a flat representation of an object would suffice because, well, you know, we’re human and we have imaginations and memory and the capacity to learn and everything, and can picture what something might look and feel and taste and smell like without having to be hit over the head with it. Humans aren’t even the only ones with that skill, you know. Trawl the scientific literature (it’s how we fall asleep at night) and you’ll soon learn that even chimps can “use information about object form and compositional structure from a 2D image to guide their search in three dimensions.”So what’s with the multi-dimensional sensory overload? As if overhyped, overpriced, after-thought 3D films weren’t bad enough, we’re now moving into another realm entirely. Last weekend saw the launch of the all-new Desperados in 3D at Sentosa CineBlast, a 3D Shoot-Out brought to you by Sentosa 4D Magix. We’re no maths whiz, but 3D x 4D = 7DD, which is either some scary new reality more real than the real world, or else it’s Barbie’s bra size.Of course, some smart folk have had their money on 4D for years. Just a shame it’s been on the 4D Toto. (A quick guide for newbies: Think of a four digit number—you can choose any number from 0000 to 9999. That’s how many dollars are being lost this very second…)Anyway, this new kind of 4D is clearly all the rage. Head down to Soul on Fri Aug 5, and you can bear witness to Singapore’s first “4-dimensional party,” for the launch of Absolut Illusion. The tagline asks us to “embrace the unexpected.” Now call us cynical, but if there’s one thing you can expect from sipping on specially concocted vodka cocktails, it’s a four dimensional experience. The time taken for your head to hit the floor? That’s your fourth dimension right there. And you’ll have plenty more of it to check out the other three while you’re down there.What does all this mean for the future? Well, for one thing, there’s a gap in the market. It’s Grand Prix Season right around the corner, and we can’t wait to receive our first 5D invite. Over to you, PR people.