You’ve Been Framed

Ordinarily, we’d wait until April 1 to tell you who to prank and how to do it. But you know what they say about any April Fools tricks you attempt after noon—the joke’s on you. And since the next issue of I-S isn’t out until that Friday, there’s every chance you’ll have missed your chance by the time you read it. Besides, you need time to pick your target and ready your weapons of mirth. A week’s notice also means you can use our new Tech Guide (It’s free to download! Grab it now before all the PDFs are gone!) to go out and buy a suitable videocamera with which to record your friends’ humiliation for posterity.

Stay up til early Friday morning, then send the following text to all your female friends: OMG! Have you heard this?? >> (Fm: Mindef) Due to hitherto unannounced changes in the law, Singaporean women must now complete compulsory NS. All females between 18-40 are to report for in-camp training in Bedok at 06.00 on Friday Apr 1.

Board the first MRT train of the day and leave flyers on all the seats announcing a competition to win a free car. State that the competition is open to anyone who stays on the train until the end of the line, and that the winner will be the person who manages to hand out the most business cards over the course of the journey.

Before you leave the office the night before, sprinkle a little ground durian into the coffee machine. Mmm… A bitter-sweet morning pick-me-up. The old cover-the-toilet-seat-with-cellophane-trick has been done to death. Instead, why not put up a feedback form requesting that all users of the cubicle leave their name, NRIC number and comments about their experience? You just know they’d fill it in.

Email your supervisors and ask for permission to take the morning off to go support the Singapore United Can be Kind to Every Race Society. They’ll say yes to anything if they can quote it in their next CSR report…

Call your parents and tell them you’ve found a flat and are moving out. (On second thoughts, that’s probably just too far-fetched. The trick has to be believable for it to work. Maybe next year, right?)