Let’s face it, we all have a love-hate relationship with Chinese New Year. Whether you’re in it just for the glorious amounts of food or love the tradition, we’re all guilty of doing these things.
1. Do Jack Neo movie marathons. Fun for the whole family.
2. Guzzle indigestion tablets and plop on the couch from over-eating.
3. Contract sore throat from CNY treats and take MC.
4. Lo hei until your fingers cramp.
5. Fight over Wii remote controls with your cousins, even though you’re 30.
6. Recite CNY greetings, receive ang bao envelopes. Rinse, repeat.
7. Get compared to more successful cousins.
8. Work part-time at Topshop and get double pay. (For those who don’t celebrate CNY.)
9. Field questions, mostly unsuccessfully, about your love life.
10. Hoard the meatballs at group steamboat gatherings.
11. Help your auntie make pineapple tarts all day…and all night.
12. Play a whole night of mahjong.
13. Grumble about the haircut surcharge. Is it so hard to work prior to the New Year that we have to pay extra?
14. Cringe at the bad zodiac sign puns that proliferate the city. Makes us goat crazy.
15. Blow a bomb at the mall on new clothes. It’s tradition, sorry.
16. Try the new McDonald’s prosperity burger with twister fries.
17. Eat Van Houten chocolate-covered raisins and “gold coins” until you have chocolate spilling out your ears.
18. Avoid any and all articles about how many calories each CNY treat has. We’re looking at you,
19. Make bak kwa sandwiches because you bought too much bak kwa.
20. Listen to your parents whine about wealthier relatives.
