The good Singaporean’s guide to New Year resolutions

It’s a New Year and for those who are drawing up a list of resolutions (or lies), here are some good ones to consider.

1. Be more civic minded. Spearhead a grassroots effort to have the green corridor air-conditioned.

2. Lose weight. Only eat food when there is a free table at Odette, once every six months.

3. Be charitable. Donate to the City Harvest Church fund.

4. Support local music. Petition to get international pop stars like Adam Lambert banned from Singapore.

5. Work on that Dad bod. Join every marathon and collect their finisher’s T-shirts to show everyone you’ve been there.

6. Dress better. Splash all your money on every mass produced, high-street designer collaboration.

7. Walk to work. Because your feet are more reliable than the MRT.

8. Embark on an artistic endeavor. Then showcase your work, but not at an art museum gift shop.

9. Resuscitate the Kampong spirit. Invite all your neighbors for a block party at the void deck, but tell them happy hour ends at 10:30pm.