Ng Eng Hen, Defence Minister
Downside: You’re pretty unpopular among NSmen for implementing a supposedly simplified, but definitely more brutally competitive IPPT.
Upside: You don’t have to do it yourself.
Anton Casey, notoriously classist Brit expat banker
Downside: Everyone hates you.
Upside: You’re rich.
Joseph Schooling, national record-holding swimmer
Upside: People will be thrilled to see the nation’s athletic pride and joy in the flesh.
Downside: They may not appreciate you boozing in the stands when they realize you should be in Glasgow for the Commonwealth Games.
Prabowo Subianto, former general and newly-defeated Indonesian presidential candidate
Upside: You’ll look right at home amidst all the military pomp.
Downside: Most people think you’re a genocidal crybaby.
Roy, one of the gay penguin dads in And Tango Makes Three
Upside: You’re no longer slated for destruction by the NLB.
Downside: Parents may resent having to engage with their kids long enough to explain your appalling existence.
Eric Ding, Singaporean businessman recently convicted of football match-fixing
Downside: You’re probably on your way to jail.
Upside: You could collect a few outstanding debts from the crowd before you go.
Choo Chong Ngen, Hotel 81 magnate and a new entrant on Singapore’s billionaire list
Upside: You may get the full VIP treatment.
Downside: No one will recognize you.
Tony Tan, President of Singapore
Downside: It’s almost certainly illegal to impersonate the President.
Upside: He’s out of town so much these days, you might just get away with it.
Please note that I-S Magazine assumes no responsibility for what fate befalls you should you take up one of our crackpot ideas.
